The wooden bench was moist from the early morning showers. She sat, watching, as the sun came up over the ceaseless blue blue ocean. The depth of the waters - the calm of the waves, the peace.. the serene.. the light breeze playing with her curls.. setting of a perfect morning, but the void inside was deafening her. She could not decipher what exactly was it that she was feeling. Was it the loss? Remorse. Was it guilt? Did she feel responsible for letting him go? Yet, nothing mattered now. Nothing she did now would get him back. Time has its own way of healing. She only hoped it would.
The moment: It was a usual day at work. Over a coffee break and some unrelated conversations, the news came up. It was an incident that happened over two years back. The resemblance, the details, the coincidence - all too overwhelming. It was disbelief at first, slowly turning into prayers. With the floor splitting beneath her, she reached the corner of the desk and sat down. Over hours, she scanned viscously through articles, accident reports, newspapers.. anything that could give her more details, something to confirm - confirm that it was just a story.
August 12, 2008. Time had stopped. It was official.
The Blackhole: The night was sleepless. Hysterical, she searched through all her belongings, desperate to hold on to the last link, conversations, photographs, letters, memories.. she had once so carefully removed. She chalked the timeline in her head, and there it was - she had absolutely nothing, that could take her back to him. His existence was a complete blackhole - a void, now all too real.
She always thought it was only mature, to move on.
The Drift: She held his hand. She didn't need to pretend. He was a good friend, he was too close. He had been there whenever she needed him and now she needed to be away. He understood. Staying close would only hurt him more. She owed him a lot. Most of all - the truth. She was not in love. They remembered their days together, the fun days, mad days, hectic days and the sad ones. They have always heard each other out, helped each other fight back up, when in doubt. "I'll find you a girlfriend" she promised. She didn't. And she never realized, when it was too late, when it got a little awkward to contact him after so many years. He must be having a great life, she believed.
That life had ended, and she never knew.
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